


Aliens in Smallville

by ssa_archivist



Category: Smallville
Genre: Alternate Universe, Humor, M/M, Romance, episode-related
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2005-10-26
Updated: 2005-10-26
Packaged: 2017-11-01 09:10:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,452
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/354802
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ssa_archivist/pseuds/ssa_archivist
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Clark and Lex prepare to come to Lana's aid, again.  That is. if they aren't distracted by other stuff.  A silly, slashy parody of the season five opener, if, ya know, there hadn't been all that negativity between Clark and Lex during seasons one through four.  *smirk*<br/></p>
            </blockquote>





	Aliens in Smallville

## Aliens in Smallville

by Magdelena

<http://members.cox.net/magdelena1969>

* * *

_Summary_ : CK/LL SLASH! COMPLETE!! Clark and Lex prepare to come to Lana's aid, again. That is... if they aren't distracted by other stuff. A silly, slashy parody of the season five opener, if, ya know, there hadn't been all that negativity between Clark and Lex during seasons one through four. _smirk_

_Disclaimer_ : I do not own any of the characters herein (only the plot). The characters of Clark Kent, Superman, Lex Luthor, and Lana Lang are the property of their creators and DC Comics. Smallville is owned by Gough/Millar Inc and the WB Network TV. I am publishing my fanfiction writings only for my own selfish desire to be a part of their world and receive nothing in return. 

_Author's Notes_ : Just a little something written in celebration of the beginning of Smallville season five, and because... 1) Lana's neediness annoys the crap out of me. 2) I really LOVE the way that people who write in the Smallville fandom fuck with canon to make it fit their needs. _melts from the Clexness_ and 3) Part of me just thinks that the Smallville producers need to give it up and start doing the narrations like they did in the old Batman TV series. (Will the rift begin this week? Will Lana wear pink and frown a lot? Will Clark and Lex ever get their heads out of their arses and realize they're perfect for each other? Tune in next week to find out. Same Supes-time, same Supes-channel.) (Ooh, and let's not forget some good THWACK's and SMACK's. Those were always my favorites!) Spoilers all the way through episode one of season five, with only selective use of Smallville and DC Comics canon. So pretty much, yeah, it's AU. Thanks to Sev1970 for betaing for me. 

* * *

"Clark, is that what I think it is?" 

Clark pulled Lex back behind the tree that was providing their cover, and prepared himself for the geeking-out that he knew was about to begin as soon as he confirmed Lex's obvious theory. In the face of an apparent visit from aliens from Clark's birthplace - or at least he was assuming they were from Krypton since their ship, although obviously larger than the one he came to Earth in, looked quite similar in origin - Clark prepared himself to finally tell his best friend the truth about his heritage. 

"If you think it's a spaceship, then yeah, it's just what you think it is." Clark sighed deeply, peering around the side of the tree surreptitiously. "And if they're from where I think they're from, more than likely they were sent here for the same purpose as I was, to rule Earth." 

Lex's eyes widened almost comically, and he tried in vain for several long seconds to formulate a reply before finally gasping out, "Holy FUCK!" 

"My sentiments exactly," Clark agreed wryly. 

"You're an alien?" Lex hissed quietly, darting glances around the smoldering field, apparently paranoid that they would be overheard. 

Clark sighed heavily, rolling his eyes. "Did you miss the part about them being here for world domination?" 

"In a minute," Lex muttered, moving into Clark's personal space, forcing Clark to take a couple steps backwards until he was flush against the tree. "I'm a bit busy being inappropriately aroused at the idea that YOU were sent here for the purpose of ruling the Earth. That's fucking hot." 

"Only you could get turned on by that, Lex. It's not like I'm really going to DO it." Clark's amusement quickly faded, and his gaze dropped to his feet. "So what about the part about me being an alien, and lying to you about me all these years?" 

Lex tenderly cupped Clark's face in his hands, and encouraged Clark's gaze up to meet his own. "Fuck, Clark. I wouldn't have trusted me with that information either, but now that I do know, I'll do everything in my power to protect you. I'll never expose your secret to anyone. If I had any idea that it was THIS big of a secret, I never would have pushed you so much." 

While Lex had been speaking, he had leaned forward, his lips now only a hairsbreadth away from Clark's. Clark couldn't resist brushing his lips lightly against Lex's before he breathed out his next words. "I have one more secret." 

"What's that?" Lex inquired breathlessly. 

"I've been in love with you for quite a while now." 

"That's good, because I've been in love with you since the moment I woke up spluttering water, and saw your face." 

Their lips met in a tender, searching kiss that somehow erased all the tension, anxiety, and pain they had caused one another over the last four seas-... err... years. Instinctively, both knew that this would be the first kiss of many, and that they had effectively taken a bold step forward, embracing the destiny that they had chosen, instead of one that was sloppily written for them. 

Their hands gently mapped out each other's torsos, but hearing a woman's scream from somewhere behind them, they reluctantly broke their kiss. 

Clark nearly growled in frustration. "Damn, all I want to do right now is just throw you down and fuck you _right_ here, but I suppose we'll have to deal with them first." 

Lex's eyes widened as he peered over Clark's shoulder. "Maybe not." 

Clark pivoted in Lex's arms, and leaned out a bit so he could see the scene clearly. "Oh shit, it's Lana! Fuck. Her we didn't need. Now we're going to have to save her ass too," he whined even as he started to move out from behind the tree. 

"Maybe not," Lex repeated, placing a restraining hand on Clark's arm. "Look, they're backing away from her!" 

Clark - finally remembering that he DID in fact have super powers and he didn't need to be craning his neck like a fool from behind the stupid tree when he could have been looking THROUGH it - focused his x-ray vision on the scene in front of him, and the shock of what he saw forced him to lean back into Lex's warmth, pressing his body flush against his best friend. "She's wearing a kryptonite necklace! How the hell?" 

Lex's arms slid comfortably around Clark's waist, and he shrugged, grinning goofily. "I'm assuming that `kryptonite' is what you call the green meteor rock?" At Clark's nod of agreement, Lex continued. "My fault there. She got it from me. I was sick of her hanging all over you. I knew the rock made you weak, so I figured if she started making you sick again that at least I wouldn't have to watch you making out with her. I even sort of let it slip that I might be interested in her." 

Clark stiffened in Lex's arms. "Are you?" 

He didn't quite expect Lex's snort of disgust, or his rather emphatic reply. "Fuck, no. She's annoyed the piss out of me since the second I got to Smallville. The only reason I ever put up with her was because you liked her, and I figured that if I kept her close I could continue to thwart you two getting together. She's always been the wrong one for you." 

"I know. I suppose that I just..." Clark paused, chuckling in disbelief at the scene that was unfolding in front of him. "It looks like Lana got some meteor dust all over the bottom of her shoes. She's using some of those kickboxing moves you taught her, and the kryptonite is making them weak as kittens. She's beating the crap out of them." 

Never one to waste an opportunity at hand, Lex took advantage of Clark's distraction and slowly slid said hand down to the bulge in Clark's jeans. "So... that fucking you were talking about earlier... maybe we should just start it here? You know, just so we can keep an eye out, in case we have to zip in and help." 

Clark took one last look out at Lana fighting the Kryptonians, before smiling broadly and turning to face Lex. "Nah, she's good. Let's head back to the castle. For once, I think I'll let Lana take care of herself." 

As Lex and Clark's lips met in another kiss, this one deep and passionate, Lana emerged the victor in her fight with the aliens. Considering how destructive the latest meteor shower had been to Smallville, in all it had been a pretty good day. After all, the town had recovered from one meteor shower, what was one more! Happy with their rationalizations, Clark and Lex busied themselves with `helping' each other, while Lana finally managed to help herself. 


End file.
